Hitting “Refresh:” Renaming My Blog and Sharing Updates

“The most understandable trap is to wait for fear to subside before starting one’s journey. It doesn’t, won’t, and shouldn’t. Too much good writing comes from writers on the edge. Trying to defeat or portage around normal writing anxieties merely postpones the day when we confront our fears directly and find the courage to write.”
Ralph Keyes, The Courage to Write: How Writers Transcend Fear

Dear all,

Thank you to ALL who had taken the time to visit my page and read my blog over the years.

I started this blog six years ago on this day with my first piece, and it has received over 6400 hits!

This day, and around this time, is very special for a lot of reasons. One reason I hope to share in a forthcoming post!

In a nutshell, this blog space has chronicled my journey for 6 years, and raised issues generally related to mental health and intersectionality. Six years ago, I finally mustered up the courage to take a blog writing course and start my blog. I came a little late into the blogosphere, as I started one back in 2007 or 2009, but didn’t think I was good enough and did not have the courage to move forward with it.

But then, I just decided in 2016, to try. And I am so glad I did. Because at the moment it looks like I have about 110 published blog pieces on here, and several still pending! I also have about 30 posts on another domain for the professional website here: www.elsatkhwaja.com. I did not write as often as I could, because of my focus and immersion within my doctorate studies, but I am so glad I stuck with it regardless, as much as I could, and I believe I can be proud of that.

I started this blog to support my creative writing ambitions with the hope to establish an outlet outside of the conventional social media. I created this space, in part, because I wanted to establish a hub and safe space for my creativity and a sense of community. I didn’t feel like I had a community anywhere, so I wanted to create one myself. Writer Jeff Goins would say that every writer and blogger has a tribe. And I know mine is out there, and I still remain determined to find or continue to keep building one (as indicated in my About Me page).

It is difficult when you do not feel like you have a space out there for you. When you have a strong love for humanity, have a message to share, and have a strong desire to connect to the world somehow, but feel like you’re in the margins. But I take comfort and consolation in my favorite writer and hero, Maya Angelou’s words…

“You are only free when you realize you belong no place – you belong every place – no place at all. The price is high. The Reward is great.” 

I have always attempted to insert myself in spaces where I feel I don’t necessarily belong. To claim my belonging, my right to be there. I think it is so important to show up and be present, not only for yourself, but for the world around you, because you matter, your presence matters, your contributions matter, your existence and your story matters.

I will write a more in-depth post on this notion later because I have more to say to that and I feel it is so important. But through my recent reflections, I have found my writing very connected to this natural human desire to belong and to have a community. But it has also helped me through many things at a personal and professional level, like achieving my doctorate recently. I think it is really important to have some sort of hobby or activity on the side, like painting or other forms of non-academic writing. Creative writing can be a necessary companion to your academic writing

Here is a great piece I located from a colleague shared on Twitter, which speaks to its value for doctoral writing: https://catapult.co/dont-write-alone/stories/anthony-ocampo-why-doctoral-students-phds-need-to-study-creative-writing

The author writes:

“When we’re doing our PhDs, we are trained to be in conversation with “the literature,” but we’re not trained to contextualize our research within the broader marketplace of ideas, where we’re competing for the time and attention of people outside the ivory tower.”

I hope to offer my thoughts on that as well in another post. But overall, I am grateful to have documented some of my doctoral journey and other posts that address issues that intersect with my identity, on this blog, while I was working on the dissertation too. I think it was important, even though it did take some time away with a few longer posts, because of my quest for perfection, which I am working really hard to reduce. Even though I have not published in mainstream spaces, I have this space where I can practice my writing, embrace my authenticity and share more stories. And as I have stated before, I hope to blog more with shorter and more frequent posts.

Aim for prolific, not perfection!

You can click on some of the hashtags on the Tag cloud at the bottom or the right hand side of the home page to see the different types of topics and themes I address on my blog!

I love to write and I have several posts that have just been sitting in my “publishing bucket”/folder! So I look forward to putting more out there this year and going forward!

Further, I have been able to update the theme with a slightly different theme and change a few features for the moment. However, the site definitely needs significant maintenance, which I could not devote much time in the past due to my doctorate studies and post-PhD transition. Hope to take a few weekends over the next few weeks to fix some issues, and add more features.

One of the big items I have decided to change is the title. Originally, I entitled this blog, “Elsa, the Warrior KQueen,” which I explain in my first blog post. But I understand how it may be misunderstood or misconstrued sometimes. You don’t want to have to feel like you need to explain or rationalize a personal brand that epitomizes your survival and your self-empowerment, your mantra that keeps you fighting and moving. But I understand it needs to be more approachable. I find it would perhaps be a little more approachable with the slight change I have now. Please feel free to send me a note about you think!

As a personal blog, that chronicles my experiences and journey, alongside raising issues that are connected to my experiences and identity, I would like to continue with that theme, with that mantra, and to have this space that honors my creating writing and projects. I have allocated other spaces for my academic, professional endeavors. But l may also still share some aspects of my journey and insights from the academic space here, because I do find a connection.

There doesn’t need to be a unified vision for all your passions and endeavors in life. It’s okay to live that “portfolio life” as termed by writer/blogger Jeff Goins. There needs to be a designated time and focus to achieve your goals, one at a time, obviously, but if writing is your oxygen, let it remain a part of your life. Let it take you places. So many people have multiple roles, projects, and endeavors going on simultaneously in their lives, and it has been a pleasure to encounter and be inspired by many scholars and academics and practitioners who are also writers, artists, and poets, over the years!

Additional Future updates will include:

Gallery Page updates:

Over the years I have significantly improved my painting and expanded the different styles and mediums, so I plan to update the Gallery page with all my paintings! There are over 50 more to add here! I have 4 different series at the moment. I started a coronavirus series at the beginning of the Pandemic (have about 10 paintings there), but I am still thinking about whether I should make that an official series. I have series entitled, Purples Skies, Friendship with Moon, Dot Mandala Art, and Abstract Art. Please come back to view those pages in the future. I might consider selling or gifting some of the paintings over time in the near future.

Mental Health Repository updates:

I would like to continue updating this component of the blog. It is very special to me. We can find resources on mental health anywhere, but for the sake of this page and website, I will continue to share many of my favorite resources on mental health and self-help here, which has served as part of the essential “biblio-therapy,” for example, which Dr. Burns discusses in his book “Feeling Good.” As I note on the page, it is not meant to be a substitute for professional mental healthcare, but rather an additional source of support, especially for those who cannot access or have not succeeded in getting the necessary healthcare or support. I aim to update with some more books, pages, and videos, and articles that I had reviewed over the years.

Site Repairs:

It appears that images have been missing and lost and I have been trying to figure out how to locate them. It is possible I will just have to repost the images manually myself. So I appreciate your patience with those particular posts.  Some contact forms and other widgets and features need to be fixed as well. For example, the “Blog Stats” should read 6461, not 5789. I may have to get a web developer at some point. Some earlier posts on certain topics may be editted and updated. I may find a better and more pleasing theme in the future as well!

Your Story: 

When I first started my blog, I designated a page for people to share any aspect of their story with me privately or here publicly, reach out to me through the contact form, or just know there is a space for them to own their story and share it with the world. Even if this space never get used, I will leave it up here for the purpose. And I will update that page to offer some other resources and spaces I have discovered that people can access to share their stories too (if those are more feasible), and also write a little more about the power of storytelling for mental health, what it has done for me and my mental health journey, and link to other writers, bloggers, articles or books that emphasize that. I will link a few of my blog posts where I have talked about this in the past too.

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” – Maya Angelou 

Other Future Updates:

Lastly, I am hopeful to add another special widget to the “Follow me section” on the right hand side of the home page soon! Please come back to find out what that is in the near future!

Once again, a big thank you to all who have come to visit this site the past Six Years!

I hope it can contribute some service, some comfort, some safety, some consolation, some connection, and some care and love to you as I continue to evolve and improve the site.

Please do feel free to send me a note with any thoughts or feedback!

Cheers to more years of speaking/writing authentically, sharing more stories, and staying connected! 

With peace, warmth, and blessings,

Your sister,

Dr. Elsa

A Warrior KQueen

“She wasn’t looking for a knight. She was looking for the Sword.” – Atticus

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